


of all the things we should've said

by neverbeblue



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: F/M, One Shot, s6, what should have happened AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-16
Updated: 2015-11-16
Packaged: 2018-05-02 00:45:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5227388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neverbeblue/pseuds/neverbeblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even her shoes didn’t fit right, having had no time to properly shop for a wedding outfit. They were a borrowed pair of Edith’s and they were almost as uncomfortable as the prospect of marrying Henry Talbot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	of all the things we should've said

She’s standing in the outer doorway of the church, bouquet of flowers in hand and minutes away from walking down the aisle for the second time when the realization suddenly hits her. It’s as though she’s been trapped living in a dream like state for the past few days, only to harshly snapped back to reality. 

Nothing is right. This was not what Mary Crawley wanted. A ceremony thrown together at the last minute, marriage to a man she barely knew and had little in common with. Even her shoes didn’t fit right, having had no time to properly shop for a wedding outfit. They were a borrowed pair of Edith’s and they were almost as uncomfortable as the prospect of marrying Henry Talbot.

No one seems to take any notice of her distress. Her father is just outside the door talking with Edith, Marigold balanced on his hip. Her mother has already gone with George to take their seats, inside the church where a surprisingly large number of guests have already congregated. Almost every pew is full, despite the last minute nature of the wedding.

“I can’t do this” Mary says, speaking aloud the words she’s been pushing to the back of her mind since her hasty engagement. 

“Of course you can, you’re just nervous is all” says Tom dismissively, not looking up from where he’s knelt on the floor attempting to fix the ribbon on the back of an excitably bouncing Sybbie’s flower girl dress. “Once you walk through those doors...”

“Oh for heaven’s sake” snaps Mary, surprising even herself with the brashness. Even little Sybbie’s bouncing comes to a halt. Tom finally brings his gaze away from his daughter. Mary is careful to lower her tone as she continues. “I’m not having some silly little butterflies in the stomach pre wedding jitters. This entire thing is a mistake. I can’t go through with this.....I refuse to”.

She’s now absently picking at the flowers in her wedding bouquet. A few stray petals have fallen onto the floor. Tom quietly ushers Sybbie outside.

“Mary please just thinks about this for a second.” He says, looking grim. He's been so distant with her these past few days, which Mary can't help but find odd considering he's the one who pushed her into all this. If anything she would have expected him to be happier than she was.

“I have though” replies Mary, and she’s almost crying because why won’t anyone listen to what she’s saying? Why won’t they believe her? “I’m not some hysterical woman who doesn’t know her own mind......”

“I know you’re not “Interjects Tom, sounding desperate and taking a step towards her.”But everyone is in there waiting for you, Henry is in there. You’ve come this far...”  
I’ve come too far, thinks Mary.

“Are we all ready?” asks Robert, clapping his hands together as he steps into the room. Edith follows, a flower girl holding each hand. Tom takes a step back. “Should be about time to get started I think”.

Before Mary can say a word, her father takes her arm. Everything seems to happen at once as everyone moves to take their place. Edith slips through the door into the church, followed by Tom who casts a quick attempt at a reassuring glance back at the bride to be. The organ begins to play as the doors open. Mary feels sick as every face in the room turns in her direction. She feels worse when she see’s Henry smiling at her from the alter. 

“You know I wish you all the luck in the world, my darling” whispers Robert, giving Mary’s hand a squeeze. He takes a step down the aisle and part of Mary is tempted to go with him. Part of her, perhaps the part of her that said yes to Henry’s proposal in the first place, thinks that walking down the aisle and into her fiancée’s waiting arms would be the easiest thing in the world. But that doesn’t stop her from stopping dead in her tracks as her father tries to lead her further into the church. 

“Mary?”

Feeling the tug on his arm, Robert turns to look at her questioningly. Mary can feel other eyes on her too and she knows she must look as panic stricken as she feels as whispers begin to flutter through the room. At the end of the isle she can see the worried faces of the other members of her family, but the sound of her father’s voice draws her away from meeting their eyes.  
“Are you quite alright?”

“I am yes... sorry Papa” It’s a split second decision. This cannot go any further. “I’m sorry”.

And with that Mary twists her arm free from her father, turns and walks out of the church as quickly as possible in those god awful shoes. 

Mary quickens her pace, ignoring the several voices in the distance calling her name. She’s almost at the end of the gravel path, almost at the road when she hears footsteps hurrying behind her. Mary turns and almost collides with Tom, who had evidently been the quickest to catch up with her. Behind him she can see others emerging from the church, a rapidly approaching Henry among them.

“Don’t try and stop me” Mary warns, sounding more desperate than she intended.

“I won’t” says Tom, and he sounds so much like the old Tom again that a little bit of the resentment that Mary’s been building up against him for convincing her to marry Henry dies away. He takes hold of her arm gently and she’s still half expecting him to steer her back into the church when he says

“Come on. You’ll get away quicker if we take the car”.

**Author's Note:**

> Written because I'm still offended about that season finale. Will probably add more chapters if people are interested. Let me know what you think, my writing skills are very rusty.


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